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Building children’s self-esteem and confidence is something in which both parents
and teachers have a vested interest. Sadly not every child develops with
healthy self-confidence or strong self-esteem. The reasons for this may be
many, but that is for another article. What will be covered here are some
tips and strategies for building children’s self–esteem and confidence
that should bring good results.
It is never too late to start building children’s self-esteem and confidence. From the
time they are infants and can make eye contact our children look to us for
feedback. They smile at us and we smile back which gives them positive
feedback. They roll over and we are excited, so are they and on it goes.
If we treat this gift we are given of having such impact on another human
being’s life with respect, our child has the opportunity of growing into
a confident child, and then a teenager.
One of the best ways we can foster confidence and self-esteem in our children is by taking
care of ourselves. Children will eventually mirror what they see. If we as
parents are lacking in confidence or have poor self-esteem that will be
the most influencing example a child will view. If our confidence and
self-esteem is healthy that will favourably impact what our child learns.
Praising children is a wonderful way of helping them to gain confidence, but don’t make
the mistake of merely giving them hollow flattery. Kids may know when they are
being conned. Praise should be based in reality, in that way it can
actually aid in building children’s self esteem and confidence.
If instead you get specific with your praise it will carry more weight. Phrases such
as “I really liked the way you lined up all your stuffed animals when you were straightening
your room” or “I noticed you were putting forth a lot of effort in
your math homework” deal with specific situations and allow your child
to understand exactly what the praise is about.
If the child is allowed to form a solid inner opinion of
them selves based in reality, they have a far greater chance of developing
healthy self-esteem and confidence that can withstand the bumps in the
road we all inevitably face.
Children also need constructive criticism. Using "always" or "never" when giving such criticism
does far more damage to budding confidence than we might want to believe.
The same way we keep our praise grounded in reality, we should also phrase our
criticism. Stay focused on the facts and use statements reflecting your
thoughts and feelings. Saying, “I noticed that you have not cleaned your room,
and our family rules are that rooms are to be neat before we go outside to
play. I would like you to please take care of that now,” will go further
in helping your child see unacceptable behaviour than, “You never clean
your room when you’re told to!”
When giving criticism to our children it should be about the behaviour we are trying to
correct and not about the child. A child who feels constantly attacked is
not going to develop healthy self-esteem or self confidence. Also, when an
occasion comes up in which we need to issue constructive criticism, if at all
possible take the child aside. This accomplishes two goals. One, the child
is better able to accept the criticism if they are not dealing with being
embarrassed and two, the child is receiving respect. This teaches the
child a valuable lesson in showing respect to others.
Building children’s self-esteem and confidence is indeed a worthwhile endeavour as
they are truly our future. If we invest wisely in our future it is sure to
pay us great dividends.
About the Author
Maureen
Staiano is a Life Coach specializing
in working with women and
the unique
challenges, opportunities and transitions we
face
in our lives. You can visit Maureen at:
http://www.achieveyourdreamcoaching.com
Article Source:
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Maureen_Staiano
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BUILDING CHILDREN'S SELF-ESTEEM AND CONFIDENCE
